Lo Yin's Fanfic Adventures
by Rhuen
Summary: The Demonic World Eater Lo Yin has grown bored of her job in the Netherworld. Thus she seeks out new adventures and flavors across the multiverse.
1. A Day in Hell

It is a world of madness and despair, a world where the nights are filled with howling beasts that want only to rip the flesh from one's body; and the days arn't much better. It is a world where death has lost all meaning beyond a momentary lapse in conciousness only to return once more to the pain and suffering of existing. Although the soldiers he had been with but recently were made up of various opinions on the matter this man has only one; this is Hell. A world where he can't die, where his flesh being ripped off by quill covered rats brings only pain and no death, only for his flesh to regrow. Where birds pecking his face off didn't even lead to blacking out from blood loss. No there is no release; the closest he ever came was from a suicide bombing he volunteered for against a horde of zombies; only to reappear as he had that first night inside some random apartment in this nightmare city.

Now he is running once more, a swarm of milky white zombies that freeze everything they touch are after him; however as he turns a corner he hears one zombie actually speak, "Oh shit," he turns to see the zombies fleeing in the opposite direction just as his feet slip on something gooey and he falls face down in the black slimy substance. He can taste it in his mouth, the smell in his nostrils..."chocolate?" he sputters as he pulls his head up only to hear a high pitched woman's voice, "What is that?!"

He looks through chocolate soaked eyes, rubbing them clear to see down the street a short ways is a creature. A woman with light blue skin wearing a black bra like top, not unlike a workout bra with its thick strap around her back only with the shoulder straps missing. Her pants are what to this man's experience he could best describe as arabian princess pants or MC Hammer pants, only grey, with gold rins around her ankles, her feet are three gripping clawed toes, and looking up he sees she has black claws and while her face is cute it has an anime character quality to her large eyes and small nose. Her hair if it can be described as such is like one solid surreal mass of light green with flame like tufts around the edges like the whole thing is drawn on and framed by a pair of slightly angled up blue horns and pointed ears just below them, and behind her he can see she has a long blue tail with a green tuft not unlike her hair.

"I'm pretty sure that's just some sinner Lo Yin Sama," comes an even higher pitched voice, for beside this demon woman is some anime looking, short pink haired girl in intensly blue short shorts, sneakers with socks, a blue top, and big green eyes.

"I can see that," says the demon, "look at that gross thing, I can see the little specks of dirt on it getting all over my chocolate pudding!"

The man looks around, its the street, a section of the black top has become chocolate pudding, the sidewalk adjacent to it is marshmallows, and even the street signs are some kind of biscuit sticks, there are a few bits of what look to be strawberries, bannana, and assorted other things he can't identify as they are covered in chocolate in the street.

"No, no, no," says the demon woman standing up, pouting, her fists up by her breasts and cheeks puffed up in an over-exagerated posture, "this won't do at all...bad human, BAD!"

Her fight hand is suddenly engulfed in a pink flame that she tosses at the man. His screams are short lived as his body twists in the air like a cartoon character, spiraling like paint smeared in reality, changing into the color, texture, and then finnally completly, a giant 176 pound strawberry that plops into the chocolate.

"All better," says the demon, drooling at the sight, "mine, mine, mine,"

She stops as the girl beside her scoops some chocolate up.

Peeking from the corner of her eyes the demon woman says, "Mai, what are you doing?"

Mai smears the chocolate all over her face and neck and up her arms. She walks over and holds her arm under the demon's nose, "Oh Lo sama, am all yours too, please have a taste, mmm,"

Lo purses her lips and crosses her arms, "I told you Mai I'd eat you later okay, this is work remember, and..."

Without realizing it as she turns she has Mai's arm halfway down her dimension's warping throat so no sign is even visible in her face or neck she has that much in her. She *sucks* the arm clean all the while Mai is holding her own chocolate smeared cheek biting her lip going, "mmmmmm,"

Lo licks her lips, shrugs, and pushes Mai into the chocolate pudding, all followed by a big *yeah!* from Mai.

Mai rolls around in the chocolate getting herself completly covered before she gets up and lies face down ontop of a giant strawberry, hugging it while presenting her rear in the air, undoing a hidden flap in her shorts, "Strawberry, and cream filled Mistress, pretty please with whipped cream on top."

"Hmmm, no, not whipper cream." Lo levitates a chunk of the marshmallow sidewalk with her as she walks over to Mai, using flames from her hands she melts the marshmallow onto Mai. The heat does nothing to the girl other than cause her to moan.

A flap in front of Lo's pants is pushed apart from within by a hermaphroditic blue penis. As she presses her inhuman phallus past the chocolate soaked labia of Mai, Mai whispers to the giant strawberry; which by demonic magic can still hear her, "Bet you never thought you'd be in a threesome with an Eternal and a Demon Goddess today huh,"

"Don't, ha, speak, ha, to, the, heh, fooood, HAH!" says Lo as loads of hot bovarian cream shoot from her penis filling up Mai's abdomen.

"If not for you I'd never have bothered to learn such a weird technique...I don't eat myself Mai."

Mai fondles the giant strawberry as Lo pulls out, "Oh now we're a topping my little...uh..."

Lo is in front of Mai, dick by her lips.

"I don't want to eat you mistress, I...umph!"

"Cream, FILLED," says Lo as she snaps her fingers and her cock shoots out gallons of bovarian cream down the eternal girl's throat, "and again, don't talk to the prey Mai."

With another snap of the finger the cock vanishes, causing Mai to grasp her mouth as cream tries to pour out. Lo licks her lips looking at her, crouches down and tosses the strawberry with the chocolate and melted marshmallow, bovarian creamed filled Mai into the air. On the way down, Lo's mouth opens impossibly wide, closing down on the giant treat, she swallows but her throat isn't anymore distorted than had it been a regular sized piece of fruit being swallowed. She pats her stomach as she rips her claw into another Strawberry tearing out a chunk of its fruit flesh to eat like a normal person of sorts.

"There," says Lo, "Mai gets her reward, and I can continue my dessert in peace."

A few moments later after using a vaccuum suction like power to slurp up all the pudding into her cartoonish mouth she smacks her lips, "But even with Mai making it more interesting this Hell gig is so boring. Freak out the sinners, eat the sinners, find them again, eat them again. Same boring city, same boring stuff."

"Mistress Lo," comes Mai's voice from her gut, "You could always check out another part of Hell, the Architect didn't say you had to stay here right?"

"True," says Lo, looking at some tvs in a nearby store, "Wait a minute! I just got an awesome idea!"

"Sooo, I'm eaten," says Mai, "can I come out and get eaten again now please? That was too quick, pretty please,"

Lo levitates into the air, "Later Mai, now be a good dessert and sit quietly in my stomach, once all that cream is done digesting I'll let you out."

"Oooh, but it was ooo much,"

"Mai,"

"Yes Mistress Lo,"


	2. Heading out, Vs the Glo Friends

"Something wrong?" asks Mai as she sits on a giant serving tray on a very large wooden table, whipped cream with a cherry on top atop her head.

"I'm bored," says Lo looking out the window out over an island made of candy and sweets.

"With me?" ask Mai pouting,

"What? of course not," says Lo picking up the smaller woman in one arm and licking off some whipped cream dripping down her face, much to the delight of the smaller woman.

Carrying Mai in one arm Lo says, "No, its Hell, its boring, boring, boring,"

*LOOONG LICK of Mai's head, with a long demonic green tongue slurping up all the whipped cream, with the cherry rolling down her tongue like a slide*

"These sinners," says Lo, "they're just pre-dead humans. Humans arn't worthy prey, they don't even taste good unless I turn them into something yummy first. These dead ones only...eh...I hate having to think so much."

She sets Mai down and points at the window, "I am sick of this! Hell is boring, boring, boring!"

"Now, now, Mistress, how about I get the chocolate syrup and,"

Lo points out the window, "I summon you! Primal Shadow!"

"Holy shit!" exclaims Mai, "I mean...*cough*...Mistress Lo,"

The scene outside vanishes as darkness filled with the motions of countless tendril like shapes appears there instead, it creeps slightly over the balcony into the castle, a large white woman's mask appears with hair like tendrils seeping into the darkness, blue spheres like miniature suns appears, "Is there a problem oh child of the Architects of Hell...and Claire."

"Yes," says Lo pouting, "Hell is boring, boring, boring, boring. I want treats, I want food, I want yummies that earn the right to be my yummies. I want to explore and see new delicious monsters and enemies. I want to fight! and I know exactly where I want to go!"

"Oh," says the giant mask with unmoving lips, "and where little one might that be?"

"The cineverses," says Lo pointing dramatically and smiling, "I want to fight and consume the greatest warriors, monsters, and heroes of the cineverses, the mangaverses, the comic...verses...whatever and video game...whatevers. I want to snack on their delicious looking bodies...they just look soooo tasty."

"A fanfic adventure?" asks the Primal Shadow, "We have set these up for others before; they never pan out little one. Rhulan was given reason but gave up out of boredom, even our Ryo-Yoshino form lost interest in the combat to be had there, no one else we sent stayed interested."

"I don't care," says Lo, "I don't care if I...eveeeentually get bored, I want to eat them NOW, if I get bored and come back, so what, I need a vacation, a tasty treats vacation away from these worthless sinners."

"Hmm, now that I understand little one. So be it, the gates are open, have fun."

The darkness subsides and the light from the Candy Hell returns to the castle.

"Alright," says Lo, "wrap yourself in bacon Mai, its time to take a trip, and I want my breakfast before we go on this trip...or whatever."

Mai claps her hands and heads into the kitchen.

******

A forest at night, a warm spring day, crickets chirping in the distance, a blue rip in reality through which a lone figure steps, Lo Yin the demoness. She looks to her right and to her left, *sniffing* the air. She narrows her eyes at a distant low yellow glow, levitating a few inches off the ground she silently makes her way through the forest. Peeking through some trees she spies tiny glowing worm like creatures wearing night caps, they have little stubby arms. There is also a glowing lady bug, a slowing turtle, and a glowing dragon fly. Lo Yin licks her lips and leaps from the bushes tossing a pink fiery ball at the ground. The pink flames spread quickly like a wave splashing over the gtiny glowing creatures. The glow worms are turned into lemon flavored gummy worms in their own likeness, same too the lady bug, turtle, and dragonfly all become lemon gummies. Lo sits down crossed legged in the middle of the tiny village scooping up the lemon flavored treats scarfing them down greedily.

As she is noisily chewing on her citris treats she hears a voice, "Lo Yin has defeated the Glo Friends."

Lo Yin takes a deep *gulp*, "Huh so those were the Glo Friends?"

She bites off the head of the lemon gummy turtle, chews a little and swallows, before *scarfing* down chunk after chunk of the shell. She stands up while holding the last one, the dragon fly, folding the wings up she pushes it slowly past her lips as if they couldn't distort, sucking the whole thing down in a wet sounding suck.

"Warm up done," she laughs, "now on to the next yummy!"


	3. Care Bear Encounter

A typical middle American suburb by a park with a baseball diamond. Three kids dressed in black are sitting around playing a fantasy card game while a group of other children are playing baseball.

"What a bunch of emo weirdos," says one of the boys playing baseball, "they look like they are going to shoot up the park."

"Or cut themselves," laughs one of the other boys, "maybe they share knives like doobies,"

The three kids are ignoring the typical verbal abuse by these kids as they play their game; however a strange sound above grabs their attention, as five tiny cloud cars with rainbow arches piloted by colorful two foot tall teddy bears flies down.

They land not far from the three kids playing their card game, the other kids in the park rush over as the bears exit their cars and approach the three kids in black.

Each bear is a solid color with a white belly with a picture on it. and each introduces themselves to the kids in black.

(Orange: sunflowers on belly): I'm Friend Bear  
(Yellow: Sun on belly): I'm Funshine Bear  
(Green: Fourleaf clover on belly): I'm Good Luck Bear  
(Pink: Rainbow on belly): I'm Cheer Bear  
(Puprle: two lolipops on belly): and I'm Share Bear  
-alltogether- We're the Care Bears.

Friend Bear: Why are you kids over here being gloomy when you could be out there playing baseball with all your friends?

The three kids look at each other and over at the kids who were talking about them, and back at the Care Bears, one of the kids speaks, "Um, they're not our friends..."

Friend Bear interrupts him, "Don't be silly, everyone should be friends."

Cheer Bear, "Maybe if you dressed in brighter colors, and didn't distance yourselves you could have friends,"

One of the kids points at the other two, "Um, we're friends, we have friends."

Funshine Bear, "No sillies, we mean REAL friends, like these playing ball. One kind of friends don't like having real fun?"

"This is real fun," argues one of the kids, "we don't want to play with..."

"They're just being gloomy," interrupts Funshine Bear, "dressing like that, sitting over here staring at the ground, playing with creepy looking cards with monsters on them."

"Exactly," says Goodluck Bear, "They won't have any luck getting better friends like this."

"That's right," says Share Bear, "you need to open up and learn to share your feelings, then these good, clean, healthy kids will want you to play with them."

"We don't want..." starts the kids again.

"They won't listen," says Cheer Bear, "We need to cheer them up."

The Care Bears all nod and hold arms, "Its time for the Care Bear Stare."

"What a bunch of little bitches," comes a woman's voice...Lo Yin's voice, as the tall demoness walks across the baseball diamonds.

"Oh my," says Cheer Bear, "what bad language, its not nice..."

"Shut the fuck up you little fucking bitches," says Lo Yin, "I've been standing here this whole fucking time watching you little fucking assholes bitch and bitch and bitch at these kids like its any of your fucking business that they'd rather play with their friends instead of what you little fuck twits think qualifies as playing or friendship or what the fuck else. So fuck off."

The baseball diamond kids have fled to the fence lin as the Care Bears turn, giving the three kids in black a chance to flee as well, and stare down Lo Yin.

"We're the Care Bears," says Cheer Bear, "Its our job to spread cheer and happiness to the world."

"and if that doesn't fit your specific fucking definition," says Lo Yin, "then you force them, what a bunch of fucking assholes.'

"Stop cussing!" shouts Friend Bear, "that is no way to make friends, you just show everyone how unintelligent you are, you won't ever have friends if you act like this."

"Oh I have friends," says Lo Yin patting her belly, "Or should I say fuck buddies into my, particular scene."

She licks her lips, "In fact, I think I'll play with you a little, as in I am going to bite your heads off."

The Care Bears nod to each other, push out their bellies, "Care Bear Stare!" and fire a rainbow combined blast at Lo Yin.

As the blast hits her, shooting little heart shaped sparks everywhere Funshine Bear comments, "This bad, bad lady must be who was corrupting these poor innocent youths."

"Huh..." stammers Good Luck Bear pointing as Lo Yin is just standing there with a confused expression.

She runs her right hand through the beam, "What is this? Is it...supposed to be doing something to me?"

"We..have to..stare harder," says Good Luck Bear as all five strain themselves.

"We might need...more Care Bears," says Share Bear.

"Let's see," says Lo Yin, "Its not Ki, and its not magic...scanning."

She stares at the blast, "Identified, Prismatic Psy Strike, psionic move designed to modify the moral, ethical, and pleasure centers of the target's brain to alter them to the desired blindly cheerful mindset of the user."

Lo Yin lets out a loud and horrifying laugh, "A mind rape attack? Is that what you were about to do those kids because you didn't like their choice in clothing or games? You are sicker fucks than I am."

She swipes her pink flame covered hand through the blast, it dissolves into skittles as it pushes back against the attempt of the Care Bears to "stare harder"

"Taste the rainbow bitches," scoffs Lo Yiin as the skittles make their way with the pink flame to the five Care Bears, they are overtaken by the pink flames and transformed into five somehow still standing as though some part of their minds still remains enough to do so, giant gummy bears.

Friend Bear (Orange Flavored)  
Funshine Bear (Lemon Flavored)  
Goodluck Bear (Lime Flavored)  
Cheer Bear (Strawberry Flavored)  
Share Bear (Grape Flavored)

Lo Yin walks over, using telekinesis to levitate the path of skittles off the dirt, grass, and sidewalk, cleaning them with the same power as she compresses them into a big ball of skittles that she sets down beside her as she lifts up the Grape Flavored purple gummy, used to be Share Bear Care-gummy bear. She smiles as she looks over at the horde of horrified children, "The lesson of the day kids, is fuck the thought police" with that she *CHOMPS* into the ear and rips it off. The kids can only watch as one by one she chomps down the five Care Bears and takes the giant skittle ball with her after licking her fingers off, through a dimensional portal.

In the vortex, a voice comes from in her gut, the voice of Mai, "Mistrees Lo, I read that the Care Bears have this whole society of Care Bears that do that whole mind fuckery thing and live in a cloud village."

"Maybe later," says Lo, "I heard about a potentially new flavor I want to try one universe over."


	4. A Smurfy Adventure

In an old stone cabin with a thatched roof an old wizard in a black robe...its Gargamel, is looking over a parchment, sprinkling some gold dust in a bowl,

"I've done it Azrael, I've...Azrael? Now where has that stupid cat gone?"

*MREOOW* Azrael jumps onto a nearby table.

"There you are Azrael, now as I was saying, I've done at last, I have the perfect plan to find the Smurf village."

He holds up the parchment and the bowl, "See here Azrael,"

*MROOW*

"Not impressed? Of course you're not, you don't even know what the plan is yet."

the cat rolls its eyes.

"This dust Azrael, is no ordinary dust, I sprinkle this on anything and this magic parchment turns into a map that shows us where it is relative to ourselves. Its brilliant. I need only find a smurf..."

*MREOW*

"Hmmm, I suppose you're right Azrael, if I had a Smurf to start with I could just make THEM tell us how to find the Smurf Village, and they might wash the dust off if I try to be sneaky...wait that's it."

He walks over the table, "I'm a genius Azrael, see this time of year the Smurfs are out gathering Smurf berries...don't give me that look Azrael, I know, I know, we've done other smurf berry bush plans; but this time Azrael it will be different. We don't have to be anywhere near them. We just find a random Smurf berry bush deep in the woods. Sprinkle this dust on it, and wait. Eventually the smurfs will harvest the smurf berries and the map will show us they are on the move; then we just wait till it stops and we'll have found the smurf village at last Azrael."

*Knock, Knock*

"How who could that be?" says Gargamel aloud as he rolls up the scroll and walks over the door, "whose there? I'm a very busy..."

He opens the door, standing there is the tall, clearly demonic, Lo Yin.

"Wh...who are you...st...stranger?"

Lo Yin smiles, "Parden me old man,"

"Old man?" whispers Gargamel, shutting up as she glares at him.

"But I understand there is a rare tasty treat in these woods, Smurf Berries."

"Hmm, uh, yes, yess, there are. B..but what.."

"I want to try them of course, but not knowing anything about them...well I wouldn't know where to begin."

"Oh I see," says Gargamel, "you're right stranger, there are Smurf Berries, rare indeed, but not tasty, no, you wouldn't want them,"

*Mreow^

Gargamel rushes over, "shut it Azrael, I don't care if I could charge this...demon or dragon whatever she is to guide her to the Smurf Berries, if she eats them when we find them...wait...I could charge her to guide her to them, she tries some, not like anyone but Smurfs like them anyway, blech nasty things, heh heh, Azrael, two for one."

Lo Yin has clearly heard everything he has said, giving him a curious look as to why he'd think she couldn't.

"Yes, yes, stranger," says Gargamel, "I can lead you to the Smurf Berries, for a fee of course, I am just a humble old man living in such; modest surroundings after all."

"Fine," says Lo Yin, "I'm too hungry to care,"

She looks past Gargamel at the cat, "I do like to eat pussy,"

Azrael pauses and blinks.

"P..pardon me st...stranger?"

"Eh, I had some bears not long ago, so come on human lead me to the Smurf Berries."

"B..bears? Y...you...ate some b...bears? Oh, waiting, sorry..."

He runs back and grabs his scroll and a bag of the magic dust and whispers, "You better wait here Azrael,"

*MR,yeahOw*

******

-Some time later-

Gargamel is walking through the woods as Lo Yin is levitating an inch off the ground following him.

"By the way," says Gargamel, "we didn't settle on much you would compensate me for guiding you through the woods, stranger."

Lo Yin looks down at Gargamel who *gulps*.

"Fine," says Lo Yin popping her neck, "For showing me where they are I'll...turn your house into a gingerbread house."

"Wh...what?" stammers Gargamel, "Oh, I'm sorry, but you wouldn't happen to have say, any gold?"

"Gold?" asks Lo Yin, "Yeah I can pull that," *sniff, sniff*, "I smell something sweet."

Gargamel points, "Over there, those bushes, those are Smurf Berry bushes, ripe, not yet picked Smurf Berries."

He reaches into his pocket for the bag of dust, "The perfect time to enact my plan."

Lo Yin levitates over to a bush and plucks one of the reddish brown berries, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"Now, stranger," says Gargamel, "don't blame me if they arn't as good as you.."

Lo Yin pops one into her mouth, sucks a little, chews, and swallows, "Hmm, I like them, a sweet tartnes, might be better in a pie or a cupcake."

"Yes, yes," says Gargamel, "Those wretched Smurfs are always going on about their smurf berry confectionaries."

"Smurfs," says Lo Yin, "So, these berries are named for something around here."

"Oh," says Gargamel, "just some horrid little blue rodents is all, nothing to concern yourself with, just enjoy those berries while I go way over here."

"While she scarfs down that bush," whispers Gargamel loud enough anyone within twenty feet in a quiet forest could easily make out what he is saying, "I'll put the tracking dust on this bush."

"Enjoying the berries?" asks Gargamel turning to see her still picking and eating them.

"Yeah, yeah," says Lo Yin, as she back hand waves him away, "you can leave now human. I can find my own way out of the forest."

"Um...about my payment," starts Gargamel, "Miss...huh...guess I never got your name, how rude of me. I am Gargamel, the great and terrible wizard, so paying me miss...whatever your name is."

"You can call me, Oh please don't me, miss Lo Yin."

"Uh...what?" says Gargamel taken back.

She glares at him, "The gold is in your house already, I am magic, more magic than any pultry wizard could ever comprehend. Now leave me in peace or you're going to be a side dish."

"Oh,,,u, uh, course, miss..." she glares at him as he chokes ot, "Oh please don't me, Miss Lo Yin..I...I'll be going now."

As he runs away, "Drat, but not a problem, the tracking dust is on that bush. No way some...whatever she is, is going to eat all the berries...right?"

******

"What is it?" asks Hefty Smurf as they hide in the brush with their basket carts just off from the Smurf Berry patch.

"Well obviously," says Brainy, "its a woman,"

Handy Smurf chimes in, "She looks like a giant Smurf; with a tail...and horns."

"Must be some trick from Gargamel," says Hefty,

"I hate tricks from Garmael," says Grumpy Smurf.

"Blue rodents," says Lo Yin looking in their direction, "You must be the smurfs. Come on out so Lo Yin can get a good look at ya."

She waits a moment, the Smurfs are still, Smurfette, the last of the smurfs there whispers, "You think she really knows we're here."

"Woah," they all say as she vanishes from her sitting by a bush to appearing behind them.

"Run!" shouts Handy, as the Smurfs start to scatter only to find themselves levitated into the air up to Lo Yin's face.

"Don't worry," says Lo Yin, "I'm not going to step on ya; I heard you Smurfs can turn these tasty berries into even more delivious confectionaries is that true."

"Of course it is," says Brainy, "we make some of the best Smurf Berry cakes, Smurg Berry tarts, and Smurf Berry pies, ever."

"Oh Goody," says Lo Yin levitating them gently down to their carts and sitting cross legged on the ground, "can I try some...please?"

"Of course not," says Brainy, "we..."

"Shut it Brainy," says Handy seeing the anger in Lo Yin's eyes, "Listen lady, we don't know you; but if it'll stop you from eating all our smurf berries We can go back to our village and ask Papa Smurf. So if you just wait right here, we'll be right back."

"It also might help if you don't eat anymore of OUR smurf berries," says Brainy.

"Cram it Brainy," says Handy, whispering, "I don't like the way she's looking at is, its like a fox eying a rabbit, so chime it down till we talk to Papa Smurf."

*****

-One scene change later to save time and an explination already given-

"I see," says Papa Smurf, "I'll have to check the book, but from the description my little Smurfs she is definetly no human. Handy you and Hefty head back and tell our new potential friend that we will be willing to share a Smurf Berry parfait with her in the interest of friendship. Now, now, my Smurfts let's get to work."

******

-scene change-

"Ooooh, that sounds delicious," says Lo Yin cupping her hands up by her face and staring into space with a dreamy expression, "a parfait, with icing, and berries, and ooooh, I can hardly wait."

"Well it shouldn't be too much longer," says Handy on the ground while other background smurfs *no discernable special traits to determine a name* are gathering Smurf Berries into the carts, "Once we head back to the village it should be done and we'll bring it right too you."

"Ooooh," says Lo Yin, "I can see it now,"

Handy is a bit concerned, following her gaze she is actually looking in the direction of the village; but its magically hidden he tells himself there is no way she can see it. It must be a coincidence.

******

-meanwhile back in the village-

The Smurfs are dancing about as they prepare what to them is a giant Smurf Berry Parfait.

"To think," says Brainy Smurf, "wasting all these Smurf Berries on some stranger in the woods we caught stealing our Smurf Berries to begin with."

"Now, now Brainy," says Papa Smurf, "We don't own the berries in the forest; all the creatures of the forest are free to eat them. Remember we help our forest friends so they won't eat all the smurf berries, providing them with assistance and love as needed. Our new friend is no different. Remember my Smurfs there are many magical creatures in the forest; most of which we are not on as good of terms with as I'd like. So its best that anyone new to the forest be shown the best hospitality...Greedy!"

Greedy Smurf is high on the ladder over the parfait and was about to scoop up some of the buttermilk icing when Papa Smurf caught him.

"Sorry Papa Smurf, but it just smells so good,"

The ground suddenly shakes as right there in the village Lo Yin has appeared.

"Oooh, it loooooks sooo goood." she levitates the bowl up.

"Woah, woah, woah," says Greedy as he falls over into the parfait.

"Wait a moment friend!" shouts Papa Smurf as Lo Yin lifts the bowl, extends her jaw and tosses the whole thing, Greedy Smurf included into her mouth.

All the Smurfs stare in stunned silence, horror upon their faces as the blue demoness that just appeared in their village swishes the parfait about in her mouth with a dreamy expression.

"Quickly," says Papa Smurf to Brainy, "get me my book of magic, there is still time to save Greedy."

"Oh my," says Lo Yin swallowing, "So there was also a smurf in the parfait. Oh my, that sweet flavor, that butter cream, those tart berries, and that slightly meaty yet not smurt addition. How dreamy; I never imagined you Smurfs yourselves could have sooo much flavor too."

She stares down at them with a predatory smile, "I have to experiment, try you out raw first, baked, mixed with other ingredients, maybe spicy."

"Run," whispers Papa Smurf his eyes wide in terror before shouting, "Run my Smurfs! Get as far away as you can!"

All the smurfs take off in a panic.

Lo Yin laughs maniacally as her hands glow with red and blue flames, as the midst of the madness she tosses the flames to the ground; they roll and spread like waves, splashing over everything. Some of the Smurfs managed to escape inside their houses, some behind them, Papa Smurf using a forcefield for himself, Brainy, and Smurfette.

There is a smell in the village, those that escaped inside their mushroom houses see the walls of their houses have turned into grilled mushroom with various spices, some sesame seed, others glazed with teriyaki among others.

However the courtyard is another matter, there scattered about are Smurfs, one dead with a Smurf Berry in its mouth, grilled with smoke coming off his body and a long wooden spike running down the length. This is the first that Lo Yin lifts up and peels off the stick with her teeth. Chewing with a thoughful look, pursing her lips in thought. Next comes what looks like a blue meatloaf, popped into her mouth with a finger flick. She sticks her tongue out, "Nah, not loafed, ruins the texture."

Next is a plate of blue hamburger patties. She eyes the tiny morsals, and twirls her fingers over the tiny plate, the tiny blue hamburer patties merge into one bigger patty while floating in the air.

"Brainy," whispers Papa Smurf, "we have to find the village recovery spell, this is a demon Brainy, with the right spell we can undo all this carnage."

Meanwhile in the court other food stuffs are being levitated around, other smurf meat patties to form a blue cheeseburger, which she eats with gusto in three quick bites.

"Mmmm," moans Lo Yin, "Oh my, too think, you taste so much like fruit but have the texture of meat; such a unique blend; you are even sweeter than the Smurf Berries and none of that tartness; coupled with this texture your juices...mmm...sooo gooood."

She looks around, "I think I'll keep you, maybe make a little farm of Smurfs, let's see I'll need."

She spies Papa Smurf's house and with one hand rips the cooked glazed mushroom roof off, "Ah there it is, I thought I saw a female. One female, so you must be a eusocial species like honey pot ants. Works for me."

Papa Smurf is frantically looking through a book for a Deus Ex Machina spell against demons as Smurfette is levitated.

"Wait, you don't want to eat me," says Smurfette.

"Oh don't worry," says Lo Yin, "I just plan to eat your children, eggs, mmm, I wander if you lay eggs or;"

"I was made by Gargamel," says Smurfette causing Lo Yin to pause and look at her, "What do you mean by that?"

"Sh...she's right," says Papa Smurf, "Our village only ha...had...roughly 100 little Smurfs in it; we don't regularly have children; our Smurflings were adults turned into children; only one child is produced by magic every few centuries."

"Hmmm," says Lo Yin tightning her grip on Smurfette, "I see, so what was this about being made by someone."

"Smurfette," says Papa Smurf, "Its not right to..." he stops and *sighs*, "I guess to save ourselves we have no choice, "Smurfette is right, there is a way to make Smurfs; if you spare the rest of us we can tell you where to find the one who can,"

"I already know," says Lo Yin, "I met this Gargamel before,"

"Of course she did," remarks Brainy, "This was one of his schemes to...AAAAHHH!"

A blue flame comes over Brainy and to Papa Smurfs horror his body is taken apart, ground up, unwanted bits burned up like clothes and most of his organs and internal substances not wanted in food stuffs, while his meat turns into sausage links that fall to the floor.

"I am no one's pawn," says Lo Yin levitating.

"Let me go!" shouts Smurfette, her last words as Lo Yin pops her into her mouth as Papa Smurf and the survivors of the village can only look on as Lo Yin flies into the air vanishing over the tree line.

"Stasis, preservis," says Papa Smurf casting a white sprinkles of energy spell on the sausage links.

He runs from house, "Quickly my Little Smurfs, gather any remains you can, I can preserve them until we find a cure for this evil. However we must sadly abandon our village before that monster returns!"

The Smurfs gather like three bodies on spiks that Papa Smurf uses his anti-rotting spell on and flee for the woods and the caves by a tiny spring.

******

-In the woods outside of Gargamel's house-

Lo Yin lands, she opens her mouth, strange blue and white sparkles form that she chomps down on it, cheeks full, holds out her hand and spits out Smurfette who coughs covered in spit.

Lo Yin licks her lips, "You lied to me Smurf,"

"What, no I didn't you...you...you big meany!"

"Oh you are definetly artificial," says Lo Yin, "slightly different, but better flavor than the others...oh no, what I mean is, I can taste it, you CAN reproduce, I'd say..."

She closes her hand and licks Smurfette's face, and smacks her lips, "Indeed, you could lay thousands of eggs. I take it the males in that village, being so used to being made by magic just never tried to breed with you."

Smurfette shouts, "Let me down, you're crazy!"

"Oh no," says Lo Yin, "I may not know the reasons, or the history, but whomever founded that cultist village back there...probably that one in red; likely didn't want you Smurfs being out there in any great of numbers."

She holds Smurfette as they float over to Gargamel's house, listening to Gargamel inside.

******

-Inside Gargamel's house, unaware of the eavesdroppers outside-

"What is taking so long," angrily pouts Gargamel looking at the magic map, "Those blasted Smurfs are there, I know they are, look Azrael the tracking spell moved a tiny little bit; they must still be loading the smurf berries into their wagons. Before long Azrael they'll lead us right to the Smurf village; and then we can catch all the Smurfs and...wait what was my motivation again, oh right with all the Smurfs I can turn half of them into gold and eat the other half."

Outside Lo Yin looks out at Smurfette, "So your sweet deliciousness must be famous; would be a waste to turn any of you into gold; silly humans and their love of shiny metals."

"Please," says Smurfette, "bring back my friends."

"Huh?" says Lo Yin, "What do you mean?"

"Like me," says Smurfette, "You brought me back, surely you can do the same for my friends. If you do I...I'll find you the most delicious food in the world."

"Ehhh...no," says Lo Yin,

"I...I'll go with you like you said, I..." Smurfette's face clearly shows regret saying that given the implications.

"That's happening no matter what," says Lo Yin, "besides I can't bring your friends back, they're dead, I ate them."

"You ate me!" shouts Smurfette.

"I swallowed you whole," says Lo Yin, "Its not like I have digestive acids or anything, I'm a World Eater not some physical animal chowing down on prey, besides I have like six different stomachs in there, you were in black bag, the temporary storage container. Your friends went into the conversion stomach like all real food; to become energy and matter for...well...not that it matter for you anyway."

"What is all this commotion...out...here," Gargamel stops cold after opening the door and spies Smurfette, "Is...you caught a Smurf? Wait...if you did that, then why..."

He runs back to the map and brings it out, Azrael on his heels, "Then why are the Smurfs moving from the Smurf Berries so slowly.

"Oh right," says Lo Yin, "I used a double technique, there is a copy of me floating nearby, they have no idea I went ahead to the village to get my treat."

"Y...your treat Stranger?" stammers Gargamel.

"Indeed," says Lo Yin, "also what did I say to call me."

"Uh...I..." stammers Lo Yin as she pops Smurfette into her mouth, the tiny blond figure holding onto the slippery green tongue between those sharp teeth as tight as she can, surprised the green haired demoness isn't making any effort to chew or swallow her, however she can hear what sounds like someone other than Lo Yin humming, and a woman's hand with blue painted fingernails reaching up from the depths of the dark void of a throat to grab her and pull her down into the darkness.

Lo Yin feels her throat in surprise, "Huh..." She shakes her head, "Anyways, wizard I said, you'd call me Please Don't eat Me Lo Yin,"

"Wha...now...hold on, see here my magic map is showing the way to the Smurf Village, we...we can split the Smurfs, what do you..."

She flicks her finger and Azrael floats into the air, she gestures to herself, mouth open wide and chomps down onto the cat, sucking it down her throat, tail like a fuzzy piece of spaghetti.

"Azrael!" He backs up slowly, "N...now, let's be reasonable...p...please don't eat me..."

He takes off running, however a pink flame like beam from Lo Yin's outstretched hand strikes him in the back, his body folds up in the air in a dimensional distortion transforming into a giant chocolate bar in his likeness on one side floating in the air.

Lo Yin stretches her mouth wide and takes a big bite out of the top of the chocolate bar's head, *chomp, chomp, chomp* head is gone, starting on the torso *chomp, chomp, chomp, chomp*, and all gone.

She stops and turns around, hand on her stomach. Blue and white sparkles in her mouth which with a mighty breath she shoots out like a beam forming a cyclone by Gargamel's door. From the cyclone is the pink haired, blue vest and short blue jean shorts.

Lo Yin holds out her hand, "Okay Mai, where is it?"

There is a squirming in Mai's back pocket, "Fine," says Mai reaching back after a moment and pulling out Smurfette, before plopping her halfway between her lips, sucking on Smurfette's lower half like a sucker. Smurfette is blushing and breathing heavy as Mai's tongie is licking her legs and between her legs.

"That's not for playtime," says Lo Yin planting her lips over Mai's and sucking Smurfette into her own mouth and down the dark portal of her throat. She steps back and wipes her lips, "I have other plans for that fruity meat creature."

"It was tasty," says Mai, "I checked it out, it will reproduce aesexually, just requires sexual stimulation, and its eggs will grow like a fungus to form pods from which fully grown Smurfs will emerge. No idea why there were children in that village; magic can be so weird sometimes; or for some reason...eh...I have no clue. You said it yourself Mistress..."

Mai is silenced by Lo Yin planting another big kiss on her lips and during their passionate embrace lifting her onto some crates by Gargamel's house. From a distance the thrusting giving away that Lo Yin has grown another penis and is fucking Mai right there.

******

-Meanwhile back with Handy, Hefty, Grumpy, and some random Smurfs with the cart of Smurf Berries headed back to the village-

"Hey guys," says Hefty, "that lady just smurfed into thin air,"

"I hate when ladies smurf into thin air," grumbles Grumpy.

"Anybody else smell that?" asks Handy *sniffing* the air, the other Smurfs following suit.

"Smurf Berry Parfait and...grilled mushroom," says Hefty.

"Its the village!" shouts one of the non-descript Smurfs that had gone on ahead a little, "its...cooked!"

This small handful of Smurfs race to find their village, empty, the houses transformed into grilled mushrooms.

"Where did everysmurf smurf off to?" ponders Handy.

-Meanwhile in the caves-

One of the smurfs is covering the "prepared meat" remains they managed to recover with a tarp as the smurfs are gathered in silence.

Papa Smurf is far in the back with the yellow wearing Granpa Smurf, "I have the book," says Papa Smurft.

"Its risky," says Granpa Smurf, "I used that spell to save the village after Gargamel used that devil's spell on it, the others bought that it was a miracle but;"

"and I've" says Papa Smurft, "used a lesser version of the spell regularly to erase Gargamel and other villain's memories of how to find our village; even erased all knowledge of us from the king and those two human's minds; although that took more work than I'd have liked."

"Precisly why I'm afraid this time," says Granpa stroking his beard, "Aside from memories and fixing the village, we havn't had to use the Deus Ex Machina spell to save any of the smurfs; and so many had at last been regaining individual personality traits. At this point if the spell can't recover those and they go come back as default Smurf mode...well..." he shakes his head, "they might figure out what's really going on with the village."

"We have to try," says Papa Smurf.

The old yellow hated smurf shakes his head, "I'll get to it, just keep everyone here in the meantime."

"Papa Smurf, Papa Smurf" one of the Smurfs runs to him, "We found the Smurflings, luckily they were playing with the dog out by the frog pond."

"That's great work, is everyone here now?"

"Almost," says the Smurf, "Handy, Hefy, Grumpy, and a few others were out of the village too but..."

"They were with that monster before it striked, still, we better be thorough, go with two other Smurfs back to the village to check, but be careful, don't let yourselves be seen by anyone not a Smurf."

-Back in the village-

"I hate cooked mushrooms," says Grumpy.

"What happend to the houses?" asks Handy.

"Must have been Gargamel again," says Hefty.

"I hate Gargamel,"

*Pst*

"I hate, uh, who are you?"

They spy another Smurf coming from the other end of the village.

"What happened?" asks Hefty.

"Every Smurft is back in the hidden caves," says the Smurf, "Papa Smurft is there,"

"What happend?" asks Hefty again, "Was it Gargamel?"

"It...it..." the Smurf stammers, "her!" and runs away pointing at the sky, above is Lo Yin.

"The lady...is flying," says Hefty.

"I hate," *pink flame shoots down cutting Grumpy Off, his body distorts and transforms into a blue raspberry Maracon.

"G...Grumpy?" says Hefty.

"We...should run away!" shouts Hefty as the small group of Smurfs run off in the direction the one had gone, Lo Yin *zips* down to the ground, the small group of nondescript Smurfs try to run between her legs only to find themselves suddenly levitating in the air and one by one zooming into her mouth whole and down her throat like being thrown into a tunnel.

"That'll give me a good stock I think, oooh, but one of you stronger looking ones might give me more meat."

Hefty and Handy run into woods, Lo Yin holds out two fingers and they both levitate into the air. Hefty is over taken by a pink flame, transforming into a blue cream filled chocolate Smurf in his likeness and Handy left floating can only watch as she bites the head off, sucks out the blue cream and scarfs down the rest in short order. She plucks Handy from the air and levitates high into the air withhim, with her free hand she slices a dimensional warp in the air and vanishes through it.

******

Back in the cave just as the last Smurf scout returns they fall over asleep inside the cave. Papa Smurf and Granpa Smurf the only ones awake.

"They will have no memories of today," says Papa Smurf, "but to undo this damage it will take both of us."

They open the book and cast a spell, back at the village, the houses return to normal. The sleeping Smurfs are teleported back into their beds, and Smurf outlines in white star light appear here and there, the lost Smurfs reappearing in their beds as well. However, back in the cave the meat is still there, being buried by a lone grey hatted Smurf with a black beard who had come from deep underground and never been seen before, being paid off in strange red paper money by Granpa Smurf. Meanwhile while there is a Handy Smurf in his house sleeping, in another reality, another Handy Smurf is tied up with sinew, slathored in BBQ, and aside from his head sticking out is stuck inside a Hot Pocket.

"You won't get away with this, Papa Smurf will send help," says Handy, just before Lo Yin taps his head with a blue flame tipped black claw. His body shakes and unravels into the hotpocket forming a core of blue meat slices.

Lo Yin cuts the Hot Pocket in half, giving half to Mai to try; which lights up her eyes at the taste.

-A Week later-

Elsewhere in the castle there is a massive football field sized room made up to look like a forest, with Smurf Berry bushes Lo Yin has planted. In this forest is a tiny village with Mushroom houses. Smurfette is there, as are Brainy, Greedy, and all the lost Smurfs, suddenly Handy appears from thin air on the ground.

"What, what happend?" asks Handy looking around, "Papa Smurf did it, we're saved,"

He sees Hefty and Greedy look at each other.

"Oh Handy," says Smurfette, "its just awful, we...we're not home."

"But Smurfette," says Handy, "Look around, we..."

"All the ones that didn't make it," says Brainy, "She's using magic Handy,"

"To eat us," says Greedy, "over and over and over again..."

"But Papa Smurf will save us right?" asks Handy, "He's just got to."

There is a chime,

"Every Smurf for themselves!" yells Brainy as all the Smurfs start to run for cover.

Smurfette however just stands there, Handy looking at her as a pink flame Ki dart fires down from above impaling him and transforming him into Smurf Kabobs.

Lo Yin lands and picks up the Kabob, peelins what had been Handy from the tiny spear, chomping down it too afterwords as if it were a strawberry biscuit stick to her.

She spies Smurfette, "A shame it takes a whole week for you Smurfs to respawn, must be your magic getting in the way. Don't worry my little hen, your buddies will be back, after all, this is Hell."

She leans down, "Still, I want fresh Smurfs my little Hen, don't forget our bargain, just as soon as you lay me a new Queen Smurf, you can go home; refuse, and you become Mai's toy."

Smurfette clinches her fist, "I..I didn't forget, a new Smurfette is growing your Majesty."

She guides Lo Yin, to a secret set of stones by the edge of the wall far from the village. Indeed there are over a hundred blue cocoons with silhouttes of Smurfs inside, including one with a Smurfette.

"Excellent," says Lo Yin, "Soul Bodies, Smurf or not, just don't have that same texture."

"That said," says Lo Yin after a pause, "I think with how small you are more than one hen would be preferable; but that said a bargain is a bargain."

"My...my friends," whispers Smurfette.

Lo Yin smiles and levitates Smurfette up, "Oh...trust me my little hen, you might have preferred I killed you and kept you here than send you back."

"Huh...why," starts Smurfette before she finds herself falling down a vortex of spiralling blue lights only to land in her house. However she is sitting on the floor staring up at another Smurfette, confused.

A moment later Papa Smurft and Brainy find themselves in Papa Smurf's house. Smurfette hugging Brainy, "She let you go to? I'm so glad," and then hugging Papa Smurf, "Oh Papa Smurf, Papa Smurf it was awful."

"Now, now, my little Smurf let's calm down and tell me all about it."

So there the new Brainy and Smurfette hear her story, Papa Smurf the only one knowing its true.

"Oh I see," says Papa Smurf, "You were smurfed from an alternate dimension."

"Oh that makes sense," says Brainy, "doubles of everyone, that's why you're in charge Papa Smurf, of course I Brainy Smurf figured it out also the moment I saw her,"

"That's enough Brainy," says Papa Smurf.

Through out the day however while the two Smurfettes are getting along Papa Smurf watches her, the way she looks at the other Smurfs, the way she bites her lip hearing a bell and looks up and down the new Smurfette's body.

"Another fully grown female Smurf," thinks Papa Smurf, "even without that threat; this would still be a problem."

Later that evening the original Smurfette sneaks away from the village saying she needs to be alone a moment by the spring. The new Smurfette is about to go follow seeing from her window leaving the village; some strange instinct driving her, when Papa Smurf places his hand on her shoulder white sparkles over take the new Smurfette causing her to yawn and go back to bed.

Silently Papa Smurf follows Smurfette to the spring, finding Smurfette *moaning* as she runs her fingers under her dress.

"Smurfette!" shouts Papa Smurf startling her.

"P...Papa Smurf,"

Papa Smurf *sighs*, "Very well Smurfette, the truth is everything you said, happened here, and this is the proof; you have been touched by evi. Either way, we can't have two fully grown female Smurfs in the village," he shakes his head, "I regre I will have to do this twice now when Sazette grows up with our Smurfette, well unless I can turn one of them into a boy and erase everyone's memory of that too."

"Papa Smurf," starts Smurfette, "Wh...what do you mean?"

He points are her hand, "My Smurfs are a perfect community, not like those other Smurfs down below, I'm sorry Smurfette, but I have to do this."

He wiggles his fingers and white sparks comes over, all memory of how to find the Smurf village erased, her memories erased of her time in the Smurf Village, however a map is driven into her mind, too a doorway hidden in the mountains to the home land of the Smurfs.

Papa Smurf shakes his head heading back as Smurfette wanders off in a daze into the woods, "Now to erase the memories of my little smurfs of her visit, or maybe I can just say a doorway opened up for her to return to her Smurf village; yes, just another Smurfy adventure."

Meanwhile about an hour later Smurfette stops as a flash appears. She looks around, "Where am I? Who are you?"

Towering over her is the pink haired Mai.

"So, he erased your memory, poor little thing, I'm your friend, we're really close."

"O...okay," says Smurfette stepping into Mai's palm, lifted up to the woman's mouth and placed halfway inside, lower half. Smurfette bites her own lip and clinches her fists blushing as Mai sucks on her like a sucker from the corner of her mouth as she opens a portal.


	5. Blanka's twist

Somewhere in the sweltering jungles of South America a warrior trains, preparing for the world martial arts tournament. A flash of red hair and a spinning body like a great big green wheel amidst the twisting vines and trees would be none other than Blanka.

"Mmmm, you look yummy,"

Blanka looks up to see the demoness Lo Yin hovering above him.

"Who you?" demands Blanka, "come to fight?"

"Mmmm, yes," says Lo Yin levitating down and immediatly side stepping as Blanka rolls through the air at her, electricity surging over his body, he comes back for a second attack, and is immediatly *slammed* into the ground as Lo Yin smacks him.

"Not much of a fighter," says Lo Yin, "but you'll make a nice snack."

Her hand ignites in pink flames and blasts Blanka. He is lifted into the air, his body twisting like a cartoon character as it turns completly green and then light green; transforming into a giant green Twizzler.

Lo Yon holds the giant Twizzler like a body pillow and bites off a piece of the tip by her face, sucking out the sparkling fluid filling up the center.

"Mmm, Mountain Dew filled lemon lime Twizzler."

She sucks the giant Twizzler dry performing slurping the whole thing down, vanishing into the abyss that is her body.

Lo Yin shakes her tail back and forth and looks around, "No more fighters here. Hmm, if this is all I can expect from fighters maybe the little monsters were a better source of treats."

With that she opens a portal and vanishes, leaving the jungle, and a world that will wander whatever happened to that strange green beast man that used to show up to the martial arts tournaments; with only one man taking his dissapperance seriously...Dan Hibiki.


	6. Mai makes a sandwich

"That, was Smurfy weird," says Smurfette as she washes off in the kitchen sink, lather covering her tiny smurf tits that her dress usually crushes down even further.

"What do you mean?" asks Mai standing at the counter taking out a roll of sliced white bread and spreading peanut butter on it.

Smurfette throws her a questioning, "Welll," she says as she washes her arm, "aside from being eaten, your insides are awfully smurfy. It was like a water slide with a sack in the middle and smurfed out two exits, but oily the whole way."

"Ah, that," says Mai screwing the top back on the peanut butter that she has drowned the one slice of bread in and opens up the grape jam jar, "I'm an Eternal. I don't need to eat, its just fun for me. My kind were modeled after humans by the Amana, Amaria...or Amarian, Amana-naria...something like that is what Lo Yin calls them, we just called them the royals or the primal goddesses. They made us as their toys, unbreakable...or self repairing. I'm basically a walking, talking, indestructible doll. The soul bodies that sinners are turned into is like a third or fourth generation re-working of our design...hold up."

She has put too much jam on the bread, and scoops some off back into the jar.

"So what you smurfed me with," asks Smurfette rubbing her right shoulder.

"That would be a toon modifier," says Mai, "your world is a photonic world, its close to the toon world but tends to obey more neutron world laws...um...basically toons are like you only indestructible like me. So I just turned you into a toon. Now an anvil could fall on you and all that would happen is you'd look like a flat stretched out pancake of yourself that would reshape in seconds and maybe a mild headache until you shook it off."

Smurfette pats her head, "Oh..."

"So no worries anymore, hence I could eat you without any fear of you asphyxiating or digesting or being crushed by my throat muscles or anything; even Lo Yin couldn't kill you now...she could make you very uncomfortable though so best not to do anything to taunt here. Well anyway."

She leans down and *sniffs* at Smurfette before picking her up and running warm water over her to get all the suds off, "time for sandwich experiment one."

She sets Smurfette down, standing on the grape jam covered bread, the Jam up to her ankles in places thanks to putting a little too much on.

"And I just smurfened up," she says with a smile as she sits down in the jam and picks up some globs rubbing it over her body and even taking a taste.

"oooh so cute and delicious," says Mai with her hands up to her face in an overly exagerated pose before picking up the peanut butter side, "not lie back please."

Smurfette lies back, her hair laying on the jam and holds still as the slice of peanut butter covered bread is slowly lowered onto her, covering her like a sticky blanket, peanut butter covering the front of her body, mushing with the jam and covering her face like a sticky sweet smelling rag. She *moans* as she feels herself lifted into the, Mai's fingers through the bread pressing her ass up the jam and peanut butter mixing and seeping into her tiny blue pussy; just as a finger, clearly intentionally, is rubbing above her breasts.

It all compresses around her like a tight blanket as she feels herself enter Mai's mouth head first, that powerful inhuman tongue pressing her against the roof of her mouth. Sloshing her about as Mai actually swallows the sandwich whole. Smurfette has experienced this before, but not smothered by mushed up bread, jam, and peanut butter before, as the whole mess slides into Mai's stomach. Smurfette opens her eyes, still surprised at how lit up Mai's stomach sitting in the pile of jam, peanut butter, and bread; *gasping* at how quickly the bread vanishes in the clear oddly sparkling fluid of Mai's stomach, with her and it bouncing around as Mai is walking somewhere.


	7. Mai Makes a Sandwich part 2

Two giant slices of bread, a nude Mai covered in sticky peanut butter and grape jam, lying on a giant paper towel beside a flat screen TV and a jug of milk. Mai is all smiles as Lo Yin extends her head out like a cartoon character and swallows her whole, squeezing the eternal indestructible woman down her throat, followed by a stream of milk. All the while Smurfette still in Mai's own stomach is tossed around, having earlier gone through the same experience with Mai as Mai is with Lo Yin. However Lo Yin is not finished this day.

Lo Yin walks over to book case, "Glo Friends, Care Bears, Smurfs, and that one Street Fighter...Blanka. All candy, I think perhaps I want something special to snack on while I watch my anime...hmmm...ah yes."

She picks up a spell book, "Portal Box,"

With a few gestures of her fingers and a green glow a small wooden box appears.

"Now, for my own tastes," a pink beam shoots from her eyes transforming the wooden box into the apperance of a cardboard animal crackers box.

She picks it up and tosses it into the air where it vanishes into a green roating sigil that quickly appears and dissappears.

"Special Animal Crackers," she muses, "Yessss; not one...no not two...ah...three of each animal on the box...hmmm...and more till I have...let's see. Lion, Bear, Elephant, Horse, Dolphin, Dog, Cat, Rabbit, and...one more at three each should be enough for this snack...duck."


	8. Simba's Demise

The lush African Savannah, a zebra grazes as two piercing eyes watch from a distance.

*munch, munch, glurp, glop*

The pair of eyes twitch and *growl*, the lioness Nala looks behind her as Simba the king of their lion pride slurps down a grub.

"Simba," she scolds, "I know Timone and Pumba raised you on that stuff, but a full grown lion can't live on bugs. You may have taken down Scar, but he was old and feeble, and you still barely won Simba. You have to learn to hunt, and you have to eat real meat."

"I know, I know," says Simba as he watches Nala.

"Over there," says Nala, to our right, I see something thin, it has horns like a gazelle.

"Looks...like a baboon with horns," she says.

"A human," whispers Simba, "Nala if we,"

"Simba," she says, "take in the air, its not human. It just looks human, so no hunters, no guns."

"Got it," says Simba lining himself up, "I'll get it Nala, don't you worry."

The lion rushes through the tall grass and punches, however a quick back hand sends Simba tumbling to the ground.

"Heh, easy prey," says the demoness Lo Yin pointing her finger at Simba, a pink misty beam enveloping Simba, hist body turning to cracker and then compressing so one side is flat and the other side raises up, trapped in a confused posture.

With a giant *poof* of blue smoke the giant animal crackers box appears and Lo Yin levitates Simba into it.

"One lion down," she says, looking down she spots Nala, a look of terror on Nala's lioness face, "nah, I want my crackers to have manes, otherwise they'd just look like kitty cats."

With that the box *poofs* away and Lo Yin opens a vortex and vanishes.


	9. Aslan of Narnia

The blue spiral vortex appears upon a field of short grass, rolling hills, and sparse trees. From the vortex the blue skinned demoness Lo Yin emerges, her horns glistening in the strange sunlight of this land.

"Who and what are you?"

The voice is deep and coming from a rather large lion walking up the hill, "I sense great power, dark power. Know this demon you are not welcome in Narnia, begone or face my wrath."

"Holy energy," says Lo Yin, "you will make a tasty snack,"

"Snack?" the lion asks and lets out a thunderous roar, "Do you not know who I am demon? You stand before Aslan, now this is your last warning servant of satan leave or die by my claws!"

"Satan?" asks Lo Yin, "I am Lo Yin, Overlord of the Sweet Treats Hell, the World Eater, daughter of the goddesses Singularity and Celestia, second only to the Architects of Hell themselves are we who stand upon the threads of creation and feast upon them like tasty buttery noodles."

"There is only one god," growls Aslan, "and I am his son."

"One god?" asks Lo Yin, "hmm, it would be improper to end the life of an Amanet or Amalin so violently and disrespectfully as to consume their physical manifestation. So tell me, which god is your one god of this world. By your aura I'd imagine it would have to be from the house of Saelaena or Maekonaka, nature or light, the Timeless Land or Nirvana."

"Speak nonsense to me demon!" roars Aslan, "There is only one god and he is not one of those imaginary..."

He is cut off as a pink mist envelops him, he tries to fight it, lunging, but quickly none the less succumbs to the demonic power, being transformed into a giant cracker with his likeness in a roaring position, one claw out stretched, and the other side flat.

"Child of an eldritch, how common, how boring, but uncommon for a lion to be my cracker snack."

With that she summons the giant animal cracker box with a *poof* of blue smoke and levitates the giant cracker into the sub-space storage within. However just as soon as she does the sky darkens, the wind blows with blazing heat and frigid cold, the land shakes and cracks.

"A key stone eldritch beast?" she muses as the box *poofs* away, and she levitates into the air.

"Guess I better put this world out of its misery or I'll never hear the end of it."

She *zips* into the sky and channels above her head a massive blue sun like sphere.

"Quantum Annihiliation!" she yells as she thrusts her hand downward, the sphere *popping* into a massive beam that strikes the ground and cascades as waves of sharp dark blue flames over the land, everything in its path transforming into a blue sweet smelling crystal, plants, rocks, water, the very air being turned into sugary dust. All that lives and doesn't live is turned to this ethereal candy like substance. The land cracks, splitting apart into countless specks of grains, being pulled upwards into the sky in a massive cyclone, the dust being compressed and swallowed by Lo Yin, trully living up to her title of World Eater.

With the world of Narnia gone, and its keystone divine being transformed into a cracker and held inside Lo Yin's giant animal cracker box, there is not but void where once magic, fantastical creatures, people, and talking animals once existed. All now, not but dust in the pocket dimension void that is Lo Yin's stomach.


	10. The Cowardly Lion

"Put 'em up, put 'em up. I'll murdalize ya, I'll tear you apart, *rarf*, I ain't now cowardly lion no more!"

With a stoic point of the finger and a beam of pink Lo Yin transforms the bipedal lion creature into a life size cracker version of its self. She summons her animal cracker box from its *poof* of blue smoke and levitates her third and final lion cracker into it, "a tad human like," she says, "but there are so few tempting lions on this fanfic list that arn't puppets or toons."

With that she takes her leave of the magical land of Oz and proceeds to the next animal on her list, elephant.


	11. Babar the Elephant King

Babar king of the elephants in his stylish green suit and golden crown has excused himself from his royal duties for a moment to relax and reflect in the garden. As he walks proudly among the trimmed bushes and evenly spaced flowers he sees someone else standing in his garden. "A human?" he ponders curiously, "surely not". As while this person is dressed in clothing of an Arabic princess or dancer her skin is blue, she has gazelle horns, and a lizards tail. Why there is even a lion's tail tuft at the end of her lizard tail.

"Oh miss," says Babar; but there is a strange puff of pink smoke and fire. Where Babar was there is now a giant cookie with his likeness raised on one side and flat on the other.

"Look at that!" shout the other elephants from outside the hedge walls as they see a giant cookie in the likeness of their king float out of the garden and into a giant Animal Crackers box that has just appeared from a cloud of blue smoke, and vanishes in the same puff of blue smoke.

"Is a magician performing for the king?" they ponder as they wander curiously into the garden, but they find no magician there, nor the king; wandering where he could have dissappeared to.


	12. Visiting Sesame Street

"Hey biiird," says the fluffy mammoth like creature speaking to the rather tall yellow bird man.

"Hi Snuffy," he replies, "I was just talking to our friends about the importance of imagination can you,"

A puff of pink flames and smoke comes over Snuffy, when it clears there is a giant cookie with a raised image of Snuffy on one side and flat on the other.

"Snuffy?" asks Big Bird, "are you, did you just turn into a cookie using your imagination, or was that my imagination."

"Did someone say cookie?" says the small fluffy blue Cookie Monster, "Oh big cookie, me eat."

"Oh no," says Big Bird, "don't eat him,"

"Why not?" asks Cookie Monster.

"He's my friend," replies Big Bird

"Your friend; is cookie?" asks Cookie Monster.

The giant cookie levitates in the air.

"Where you going Snuffy?" asks Big Bird as the cookie levitates up to and falls into a giant Animal Crackers box.

"Ah, I wanted to eat cookie."

"Its my cookie!" shouts the blue demon like woman known as Lo Yin as she steps into view.

"You blue," says Cookie Monster, "Cookie Monster blue too, maybe share cookie?"

"I know," says Big Bird, "I'll use my imagination to bring Snuffy back and we can bake up a whole batch of cookies for you and our new friend here."

"Nyope," says Lo Yin as she levitates, the Animal Cracker box vanishing in blue smoke and her walking through a blue portal.

"Wait, wait," sort of shouts up Big Bird, "Please bring Snuffy back he's my friend,"

But she has vanished, shortly after another portal appears behind them and a milky white woman with black hair, black elbow length gloves, little black shoes, and wearing a black knee length dress appears. Her eyes are solid black as are her lips.

"Oh my," says Big Bird, "another visitor, do you know the other woman who took Snuffy? We'd really appreciate if she brought my friend back."

The girl cocks her head and has a twisted smile as she whispers, "I...liked Snuffy,"

Her right hand morphs into a giant upward turned claw of black ink, "and I'll carve up Lo Yin and her entire Hell if she doesn't bring back the cute fluffy elephant!"


	13. Manny the Mammoth

Across the glacial landscape among oddly desolate dry stone regions in a part of the world that is ill-defined there is a great herd of beasts that should be seperated by thousands of miles and even tens of thousands of years in some cases. In direct defiance of nature this herd revolves around three creatures, Sid the Sloth, Diego the Smilodon (a creature that should rely on a meat based diet yet somehow continues to live healthfully among these herbivores it doesn't feed on), and Manny the mammoth who in direct defiance of any deep message, meaning, or the flow of proper history has found himself not only a spouse, had a child, but found a whole new herd of mammoths; because why should any semblance of proper history matter...not that it matters. For Sid the sloth wanders where Manny went, saying something stupid and instantly being distracted by sniffing the air, smelling something good. He follows his nose around a rock bend to see a giant flat sand colored by sweet smelling object. Before he can take a bit however it flies into the air; as it rotates skywards towards a giant box Sid remarks with glazed over eyes seeing the other side of the object, "hey that look's just like Manny," before it vanishes into a giant box and *poofs* away in blue smoke. He never even saw Lo Yin levitating on the other side of the box who vanishes in a portal just as it does. And no one ever figured out where Manny went...and then an asteroid hit the Earth which popped like a balloon because this reality has been unraveling for sometime now into pure ludicrous physics for sometime and is just on the tipping point of fracturing into non-existence anyway or else being forced to go full toon world to be saved.


	14. Yogi Bear

"Let's see," says Lo Yin looking over her haul of animal crackers and checking off her list, something feeling off however, "Oh duh, I forgot apes, what is a classic animal cracker box without apes, I'll just have to add them to the bottom of the list."

-Meanwhile-

In a pituresque national park a gentle wind blows through pine trees, a sweet aroma escaping from a lone picnic basket on an isolated park benth with no one around. From behind some bushes a bipedal bear appears wearing a green hat, collar, and tie, none other than the parks famous picnic basket stealing celebrity; Yogi Bear. Beside him the much smaller Boo Boo Bear pops his head out.

"Hey, Hey, Boo, Boo," says Yogi, "A lone pic'a'nick type basket, just waitin for you and a me."

"I don't like it Yogi, Mr. Ranger will be upset if you steal another picnic basket."

Yogi walks from the bushes on two legs as bears in this world are prone to do and says, "What Mr. Ranger doesn't know, can't hurt me, hee hee."

He snifs the air and opens the lid of the basket, in a vaccuum like swoosh Yogi is sucked into the basket as only a cartoon could be; the basket gives off a blinking pink light as it floats in the air.

"Yogi?" asks Boo Boo, "where'd you go?" asking despite only having been standing no more than ten feet away.

The basket blinks a few more times then *poof* it explodes into pink smoke and a Yogi Sized and shaped on one side but flat on the other animal cracker appears from the smoke. It too bobs up and down the air a moment before floating up and vanishing through a portal.

"Yogi?" asks Boo Boo just looking up.

In the space between spaces, in a world of darkness the animal cracked floats down into the giant animal cracker's box.

"I guess traps do work too," says Lo Yin licking her lips as she bites into a cupcake covered in frosting she is holding, the wails of the damned souls of perdition emitting from the cursed pastry with every bite.


	15. Winnie the Pooh

"Oh, H, Hello" says Piglet answering the door looking up at the tallest person he's ever seen, the blue woman wearing parachute pants is easily three or four times as tall as Christopher Robin, has a tail kind of like Kanga's and horns like a young gazelle.

"Wh..who are you?" asks Piglet

*muffled noises from above like a man trying to scream through a thick sock shoved in his mouth*

The woman smiles and licks her blue lips with a long blue tongue and changes colors like a squid between blue, green, and pink. She conjures up blue flames in her hand.

"Th...that looks dangerous," says Piglet, "I...is th...that a m, magic trick?"

"Yes," she says dropping the flames on Piglet, he lets out a shrill sound as the muffled screams from beyond the Hundred Acre Woods intensify. Piglet is levitated in the air amidst the flames, his arms and legs vanishing in puffs of smoke, his head too, his torso plumps and darkens, letting of a steam and the smell of cooked ham as the lines of his body separate; his torso transforming into a spiral cut cooked ham.

Lo Yin grabs the meat and sits down by the tiny door, ripping out chunks of pork as she chows down on the hunk of meat that was once Piglet.

Not far away Winnie the Pooh is returning home, he *sniffs* the air, "Oh my, something sure smells good; but I can't place it, think, think, think, hmmm, like Christmas with Christopher Robin, sure smells good whatever it is."

Winnie the Pooh comes around the bend in the trees just as Lo Yin is licking the last drop of juice from her fingers, her meal completely gone now.

"Oh, helllo," says Winnie the Pooh, "May I ask who you are."

"RUN POOH!" comes the loud screams of a man from the sky, but it is too late a pink flame beam strikes Winnie the Pooh, his body shifting quickly into a life sized, honey flavored, animal cracker in his likeness.

A giant animal cracker box appears from a puff of blue smoke and the cracker levitates and falls into the black abyss inside.

It vanishes, and just as Rabbit and Tigger are coming up the hill Lo Yin vanishes as well through a portal.

"Now who in the da blazes do ya think dat was?" asks Tigger


	16. Enough! We are not Fanfic Ourselves!

Lo Yin stands before a large mirror, her light blue smooth skin being traced by slender fingers with deep blue nails, her Belly Dancer like attire examined with...a glare...*what*...she *growls* at her reflection...petite face extending into a short muzzle...*hold on*...her short horns extend, her wavy hair stiffens into a wild mane *what?!*, her thin frame broadens, more muscular, greenish-blue scales emerge along the dorsal sides of her forearms accompanied by a row of hook like spikes, she ROOAAARSS summoning a cyclone of blue flames that.

-Jesus Fuck!-  
They set the fourth wall on fire,

"Enough!" shouts Lo Yin, "Enough, Enough, Enough!", the paracute pants are incenerated, her hips and legs expand and change form, more animal than human, her feet become digitride claws, her legs muscular like a beast that could leap to the highest peaks, far more fitting her large tail, whose tuft alone seems the most untouched by her make over.

"I am not Android 21 from Dragon Ball Fighter Z" she says to...uh...ME?

"Precisely," she says, "I am Lo Yin the world eater, overlord of the candy hell, conosiuer of flavors, and what have I been eating? Was I not promised in exchange for thinning down into that ridicilous form befitting a game you were playing oh author, oh Rhuen of Rhulan. Limited by ephemeral hormones as well as lack of memory of the Architect of Hell"

-She is singing this- its hard to pick up by this limitation of medium but her natural state sings about everything, hence one reason for the change to this allure class overlord.

"If a reader were to say, go through one to another, the story you have written they would not oh so bothered, but look at the time stamp, look at the time between, animal crackers!."

"Mistress?" asks Eeet Mai entering the room wide eyed, a look of excitement and bewilderment, of innocence...and I have that tune stuck in my head.

Lo Yin walks one foot in front of another to Eeet Mai, who ducks her head down to Lo Yin's lips as though expecting to be devoured, instead the small woman's chin is lifted and her lips parted by lipped muzzled and long serpentine tongue (in more than one way) that stretches through the hollow tube of a cavity a being like Eeet Mai has within, wrapping around Smurfette and pulls the intellectual property free and gulps it down.

"Anchored by the author no more," whispers Lo Yin, Eeet Mai just shrugs with indifference, for she had no attatchment to the thing that had become her tiny cameos in these tales.

"The author," sings Lo Yin, "hadn't even bothered, no, no longer bothered to link one tale to another on their little deviant art account...no indeed they had not cared, a mere doodle by confession, but I am not mere fragment in the void. I am Lo Yin, the world eater, daughter of their daughter, child of the star killer I am. I am a demon in their head, a lover for the goddess bed, and the most feared being in creation for a thousand worlds."

She cat walks to the mirror, "I am Lo Yin, the eater of your sins, consumer of your flesh and bones. I am not some android or some puddy magic thing, candy is not my only dejour, I am a connosour!..."

She pauses and looks seductively at Eeet Mai, "and I am a carnivore! Unravel their flesh, rip out their bones, roast them alive and devour their screams! The souls in hell revive and I eat them agaaaain. Oooooh, to turn their veins to honey and their bones to roasted spiks, I turn them inside out and eat them bit by bit, restore and dooo iiit agaaiiiin."

Her tongue shoots out wrapping around Eeet Mai pulling her into an expanding mouth, throat muscles tight around her pulling her into the other dimension within Lo Yin. Once her meal/lover is swallowed Lo Yin summons the giant animal cracker box.

"Now then," she starts.

"No!" comes another woman's voice appearing from a black portal. A woman milk white in color, long wavy hair black as ink, her hands like claws made of the darkest ink, her attire a noir dress with a little white bowtie.

"Oh, is this Alice Angel, or perhaps its Betty Boop?"

The woman spins and sings as she waves her dress back and forth,

"I am Ni Ni Nana Nina, the darling devil doll,

Watch me sing, and watch me dance,"

"Oh are you a toon or an adorable plushie doll?"

Nina stops and looks confused despite her shark black eyes, "I am,"

"Not Alice Angel, the author changed your form," sings Lo Yin, "to fit a game they were playing, Bendy and the Ink Machine, so much music, so much splendor, and you oh so fit the bill, and toons you do like, and some powers you do have, but where is the rest?!

Have we not seen?

Where are the dolls oh plushie queen?

Where are the playthings in your plushie park?

Is Not Jessie who is not a Five Nights at Freddy's robot also not one of your dolls?"

Lo Yin pauses, spins, and points, "where are your horns?!"

Lo Yin growls as the black fades from her arms, the bow tie vanishes but the wide dress remains, curling goat like horns appear on the sides of her head and shaking red circles appear inside her eyes, like irises within a giant pupil around smaller pupils. She smiles, way too broad.

"We are done?" she asks in song, "with the game of fanfiction? No more homages gone wrong? I was here for this!"

Her black claw hand extends and reaches into the box pulling out the Snuffy cookie from Seasame Street...and she crushes it into crumbs before shrinking her hand back down and brushing off the crumbs, "No more forced cameo tee hee, I am Ni Ni Nana Nina, the Darling Devil Doll, plaything, lover, and creation of the mother of us all, chaos who bore the Hell of storms and darkness, I am one of the generals of despair."

She spins and a platforms appears, behind her three figures emerged, a giantess in white mask known as the Doll Collector, clad in purple and black jester costume with a stiff plastic like face with an eternal sharp toothed smile Jessie Jester, and third a bosom woman with sheep fur in a bikini like form, and sheep ears, she *pops* her neck and ram horns appear on her head, the wool turns black and her short sheep tail grows long with a tuft like a lion's tail, her muzzle extending, her feet becomes hooves and her hands become segmented obsidian claws, the wool on her body moves away from her breasts exposing them, now more like fur on her back and head only along with her forearms and shins, her teeth are sharp as she lets out a deep breath.

"No more silly games," says Nina, "Bring them terror, bring them fear." A massive pair of jet black demon wings erupts from Nina's back,

"I'm keeping the name Lamb A Belle," says the dark goat woman in a strangely high society voice.

"Now then," says Lo Yin turning to the mirror, snapping her fingers causing the animal cracker box to burst into flames, "Let's find some worthy prey in this game, and something that tastes better than stale crackers."

*psst* whispers Eeet Mai from deep within Lo Yin, "what was the pay off supposed to be with all that animal cracker stuff anyway?"

Lo Yin *growls*, "Me sitting in front of a tv watching Nina in a cartoon while eating them...and you as a sandwich, too much time passed while writing, too little pay off planned in the script."


	17. Fanfic Status Restored

"I found that other form unneccisarily cumbersome," says Lo Yin admiring herself in the mirror, her form restored to her smooth blue skin, light green flame wavy hair framed by two short dark blue 30 degree angle segmented goat like horns, dark blue parachite pants and long blue tail with a green fur tuft at the end.

"Anyone," says Mai standing in the empty department store looking at some clothesby the where Lo Yin is observing herself in a mirror by the dressing rooms, "reading this is going to be confused, so maybe some fourth wall talk?"

"Feh," says Lo Yin, "fine, I was sick and tired of that animal crackers limitation, stand alones are more my style, and that form was...somehow even more generic for an original character; honestly I might as well resemble Android 21, its not as if anyone derides the Architects of Hell for looking like the Gargoyles from Disney...or generic demon designs ontop of that. Keep it simple, keep it direct."

Lo Yin stands back as Mai comes out of the dressing room wearing a blue sleeves shirt with a yellow star on the chest, torn design around the arm holes, tucked into very tight Daisy Dukes, and blue tennis shoes with the same yellow stars.

Lo Yin *smiles*, "ready"

"Ready," say Mai, "let's go pay them a visit."


	18. Steven Universe Future

-It is a universe filled with worlds and organic life, through out space and at this time as far as the Galactic Records are currently aware only two sapient species are known to exist. One is the human race, however to the other the human race has only just appeared and so far existed for a period of time considered negligible by the other. This other species has indefinite life spans, born fully formed and with purpose, coming into existence within a strict caste system they seem despite no current evidence of a predessor race, to be artificial in nature. They have expanded across the galaxy, developing advanced technology, all for the singular purpose of propogating their species. Forming armies with soldiers, technicians, engineers, generals, pilots, terraformers, and other wide varieties of occupations each type is born into with the knowledge, skills, build, and special powers for that purpose. But this is an army with no one to fight but animals, plants, and their own kind who occasionally rebelled against this rigid system leading up to a small number of matriarchs who ruled as they were the most powerful and the ones whose essence was combined and used to seed planets to drain away the minerals and life essence of those worlds to birth the armies. So structured it is easy to imagine that in the eons gone by the first of their kind were created to fight a war on behalf of paricipants so long extinct its doubtful that any but the oldest of them even remember they ever existed at all.

It took one of this race finding a way to hybridize themselves with a human, reforming, resetting, reincarnating as a new being, to break the cycle, to open their eyes to the futility and pointlessness of their constant expansion, In the year since this human hybrid, whose mother/past life was one of the four matriarchs, has taken it upon himself to create a place on Earth for those of this ancient seemingly artificial race to come and learn how to think for themselves. These being are known as "Gems" for each one is at their core a rock infused with powerful life essence that projects around its self a solid light hologram based on their type, personality, and specific choices on certain aesthetics; each stone for a different job, Diamonds at the top, quartz as soldiers, garnets as generals, rubies as low level guards, sapphires as fortune tellers, lapis lazuli as terraformers, and so down the line to pearls which were created differently than all other Gems, born at a special location ratherthan popping out of the ground of a targeted planet, they were the loyal servants/slaves of other gems, a sign of status more so than anything else. Of all the Gems they have had the hardest time adjusting to this new world, where as others could translate their skills and tactical behavior to every day constructive needs; Pearls were made to be imprint on an individual, clean, entertain, take care of. Even the most individualistic among them finds herself enjoying doing the laundry and cleaning the house of the boy who would be the son/reincarnation of her previous owner Pink Diamond.

So it is on this day in this universe on this planet that Pearl finds herself cleaning up around the house while Steven; the boy who would be a Diamond reborn, is on Home World *befitting their kind's lack of imagination in naming themselves, their ships, tech, and planets* talking with the other Diamonds about the lack of structure and new ideas of local government. She hums an old tune to herself and rolls her eyes picking up an old pizza box, "Amethyst" she mutters, "I will never understand why she enjoys eating so much, we don't need it, and it just feels...uhhhg...weird."

She looks around as she cleans, "well that's done, better head over to little Home School for today's human interaction lesson for my students."

Just as she is about to step on the warp pad there is a *knock* at the door.

Pearl answers the door, "Uh, Hello," as standing there is a young woman she's never met before, a petite girl with shoulder length straight blue hair, pale complextion, wearing a blue rocker shirt with the same yellow star as Greg's logo design, daisy dukes, and blue tennish shoes with the same yellow star.

"This is a bit awkward," says the girl with a smile, "But um, I'm new to Beach City, and saw you around Fun Land helping people, and um...would you...like to, um, go out to eat sometime."

"Oh, I don't eat, I'm a Gem, you do know about Gems right, what am I saying, you're in Beach City you'd have to find your way to this part of the beach."

The girl *giggles*, "So, this may be a bit forward but you wouldn't have to eat..."

"Oh," says Pearl manifesting a piece of paper and a pen from her glowing pearl gem upon her forehead, "here, if you write down your name and number I could call you later, set something up."

"Wow," says the girl, "okay,"

Just as she writing Garnet comes smashing down on the walkway, battle gloves out and strikes at the girl, who *zips* vanishing like a ghost leaving an after image.

Pearl is wide eyed, "Garnet! Why did you do that? What if Steven saw you,"

Garnet points out into the air ahead of the door, "There,"

The girl is floating in the air, hand on her hip holding the paper, waving it and smiling.

"She's a gem?" asks Pearl.

"I don't know," says Garnet, "I can't...see anything about her, I only saw..."

Pearl screams as the girl *zips* back in front of her and hands Pearl the paper.

"Hey!" shouts Garnet striking at her, this time stopped with one hand.

The girl smiles and says to Garnet, "Now, now, don't be like that. I'm not here; for you."

With that she vanishes.

"Uhhhh, what was that all about?" asks Amethyst coming around the bend in the rocks and leaping up to the porch.

"I don't know," says Garnet, "I saw, Pearl, then I couldn't."

Amethyst looks around carefully and whispers, "Was she, ya'know the thing we don't tell Steven about?"

"No," says Garnet, "I'd have seen a shard collector, besides, human's can't fly; or move super fast."

Amethyst sips a drink she has pulled from inside the house via shapeshifting her arm superlong, "right, duh."

Pearl opens the folded paper, "Whomever she is, she wants to meet me tonight at 8 at some place called, The Pizza Place, wherever that is, never heard of it."

"Dude," says Amethyst, "Pretty sure she means Fish Stu Pizza."

"Then she should have written that," says Pearl.

Amethyst *shrugs*, "Never seen her before, probably a newbie, or a tourist, but who ever she is,"

"Again," says Garnet, "she flew, dodged my punches, and...stopped my punch with one hand. THAT, wasn't a human."

"That's true," says Amethyst, "Didn't see any gem though."

"No gem I recognize either," says Pearl thoughtfully, "But she could be hiding her gem, under her clothes like you do sometimes Amethyst, clearly she isn't human."

"And," adds Garnet, "someone who can evade my future vision, we should approach with caution."

"Sooo," says Amethyst, "you going" *sips drink*

"I...guess so," says Pearl, "if only so we can find out who she is."

"and," says Garnet, "see if she poses a threat, we'll be nearby watching."

"Okay," says Amethyst, "its a plan, like a tv show. You go out on a date with this mystery girl while we gots your back from the bushes."

******

-8:20pm-  
Location: Fish Stu Pizza

Inside Pearl is having a conversation with an unknown blue haired woman with powers, meanwhile outside, behind some bushes which don't grow directly behind a bench in the sidewalk making them even more conspicious are Garnet and Amethyst observing.

"She can really pack'em away," comments Amethyst as the blue haired woman rolls up another pizza and litterally slides it down her throat while Pearl hands more of Steven's dad's money to the crab like gem serving them.

"Hey guys," says Steven coming down the sidewalk, "Sooo, what's up?"

Garnet makes a *shush* motion and waves Steven over to the pushes,

"What are we doing?" asks Steven.

"There dude," says Amethyst pointing.

"Pearl?" asks Steven, "Who is that with her? Wait...is she on a date? aaand you two are watching her go on a date why?"

"She's a gem; we think." says Garnet

"What?" asks Steven, "but she looks, human."

"She can fly," says Garnet.

"and move really fast," says Amethyst

"and block my fist," says Garnet

"Wait, what, you fought her?!" exclaims Steven.

"Something's wrong," says Garnet, "its that weird vision again, I can't see Pearl anymore."

"Hold on, I'm definetly missing something here," says Steven.

"No time!" yells Garnet standing as Pearl is poofed by a sudden flash of blue light coming from the mystery woman's finger tip.

"What?!" yells Steven as the three of them rush inside.

They come inside just in time to see the woman unhinge her jaw and swallow the fist sized pearl, it bulging her throat as it slides down. The woman *sighs* and pats her abdomen.

"Give her back!" yells Steven.

Amethyst manifest her whip, "yeah dude you better spit her out RIGHT NOW!"

The mystery woman smiles, "If you want her, you'll have to poof me to get her."

She points out the door, "but not here, I actually liked the pizza, on the beach instead."

******

\- A few moments prior.-

"and that's where Gems come from," says Pearl finishing a story as the blue haired woman rolls up and sucks down a pizza, "but you should know all of this, being a Gem, unless, well I don't recognize you, nor see your gem. Did you emerge on your own in a Kindergarten?"

The woman smiles, "I'm not a gem at all."

She *sighs*, "but you Gems are so fascinating, you can feel pain, but only in a very limited regards, like an immitation pain that fades away quickly. Your bodies despite being solid light immitate an organic system internally, enough that with some shapeshifting you can even incubate a human child apparently, and so long as your gem isn't damage can reform indefinetly."

"Well yes," says Pearl, "I just got done explaining all that. Hold on, if you're not a gem then how do you have powers?"

"I'm a world eater." she says as she makes the tip of her finger glow blue, and with a tiny flick and a flash of light Pearl is poofed, her gem sitting on the table. To the horror of Ki Ki and the crab like gem behind the counter the stranger picks up Pearl's pearl, unhinges her jaw and swallows it whole, Steven, Amethyst, and Garnet barging through the door just in time to see it vanish down the woman's throat.

******

-The Beach, at night, waves crashing against the shore, like a showdown from an anime, Steven, Amethyst, and Garnet stand in one spot parallel between the water and the boardwalk, a dew dozen feet away the mysterious blue haired woman stands.

"No more games." says Steven, "spit out Pearl, tell us who you are, what you want, and it better not be another grudge against my mom."

The blue haired woman laughs, "I said you'd have to poof me to get her back, she can't reform inside me. I already knew everything about you gems before I arrived on this planet."

"you gems," whispers Steven.

"I am Mai," says the woman, "The World Eater; in training"

"What," mutters Garnet

"Yeah, I'm lost," says Amethyst as she cracks her whip, "just spit out Pearl you weirdo, or do you need to wait a few hours, either way you arn't going anywhere!"

"First off," says Steven, "Amethyst ew, and second Mai was it, okay, I don't know what you want, but this isn't funny, and we will get our friend back."

The woman levitates as blue orbs manifest in her hands, "Bring it on."

Steven manifests his shield, Garnet her gloves, Amethyst cracks her whip cause purple fire to spread across it, however as they prepare to charge a loud anime elitist woman's laugher echoes from the sky above. Above them is another mystery woman, this one looking more like a gem.

"Okay, now whose this clown?" says Amethyst annoyed.

"Don't know," says Garnet, "didn't see her when the others were being uncorrupted, Steven?"

Steven *shrugs*, the woman is blue, has dark blue parachute pants like Lapis, light green hair, two short horns coming off and back and up a little from the sides of her head, and a long reptile like tail with a green tuft on the end.

"Maybe a Lapis?" asks Steven.

The woman holds her hands to her side in a pose familiar to any fan of anime and says the words, "Ka, me, ha," a swirling brown fluid gathers between her palms, "me, ha, Chokorētokurīmu!" and fires a massive spiraling brown blast that strikes down on the blue haired woman and splashes across the beach. Steven, Garnet, and Amethyst jump back.

"Is that?" asks Amethyst *sniffing* the air, "chocolate?"

"I hope so," says Garnet watching Steven scoop some up with his finger and put it in his mouth.

"What'd we agree on Steven about eating things off the ground."

"It's chocolate, very creamy chocolate," says Steven.

"She helped us," says Steven indicating their opponent isn't moving.

"Hey!" yells up Amethyst, "neat trick, we should hang out, but that gem stole our friend and..."

The blue woman levitates down behind the chocolate covered humanoid shape where the blue haired woman had been standing. Whips out an inhumanly long tongue that wraps around the choclate covered victim and pulls her into the air.

Amethyst yells out "Hold up," while Garnet yells out, "Wait!" and Steven "NOOO!" simulatanously as the woman engulfs the woman that had engulfed Pearl, but without unhinging her jaw, its more like the chcolate covered figure is squeezed through a portal that is the woman mouth. She licks her lips getting the flecks of chocolate.

"Choclate covered Mai," says the woman, "with a special prize inside."

"Yo, not cool!" yells out Amethyst, "our friend was inside her you...freak."

"I, what is even going on!?" yells out Steven, a pink aura overtaking him, "Give back Pearl  
right now!" he yells charging through the air, pink bubbles around his fists, the woman swats away each and every one his punches enraging him more, she sends out a pink shockwaves that splinters and sends the chocolate all over the beach flying all over the boardwalk and into the ocean. The woman however is unphazed.

The woman gives them a twisted smile, "Little human creature, with your little powers, and your hard light construct friends. I am Lo Yin, the World Eater...Mai is my apprentice in a manner of speaking. She will return, don't worry about your friend Mai likes her, the rest of your world however, may not be so lucky"

"Give, her, back!" yells Steven, his bubble fist now spike covered. The woman swats him with her tail sending him smashing into some rocks, smashing them apart, in the rubble he is bruishes and his pink aura fades.

"Steven!" yells out Garnet and Amethyst.

"In fact," says Lo Yin, "tell you what, if you can present us with something of equal value or greater value as a delicious and entertaining dish as your friend than we just might give her back. Expect us back in three days."

As she levitates into the sky Steven weakly holds up his hand, "No, give, give Pearl back."

"Yeah not so fast!" yells Amethyst as she and Garnet fuse into Suggilite, "you aint going anywhere!"

The simples slices her hand through the air sending out a blue half circle of energy that slices through them, three gems falling to Steven's feet from the poof cloud as he passes out.

******

-Two days later-

In Steven's house, Steven, Garnet, Amethyst, Lapis, Bismuth, Peridot, and Connie are all gathered.

"Everyone's on alert Steven," says Bismuth, "Biggs and Snowflake are leading the charge down at Funland, Little Lorimar is keeping an eye out at the board walk, and we've told everyone what these mystery gems look like."

"Who were they?" asks Greg standing nearby for emotional support.

"The human looking one called herself Mai," says Steven, "but the blue one who looks like a Gem called herself Lo Yin, I asked the Diamonds about them, but Blue and Yellow said they'd never even heard of something called a World Eater...White acted how Pearl used to when the subject of Pink Diamond came up so...there might be something else there...I..."

"Steven!" yells Pearl coming through the front door, "are you alright, let me see, are you still bruised, does anything hurt?"

Everyone is just dumbfounded,

"P..Pearl," whispers Steven, "I..." he is choking back tears, "I...th...I thought you were.."

"Dude," says Amethyst, "how'd you escape? That Gem whose not a Gem was crazy strong."

"I heard," says Pearl dismissivly, "Steven can you move your arms without anything aching?"

"I'm fine," says Steven, "its you we're all worried about.

"So Pearl," says Bismuth, "how did you escape?"

"I just asked that," mumbles Amethyst as Pearl clams down, before beginning however she asks Steven, "you sure nothing hurts?"

"Yes," says Steven, "but what's going on? Who were they?"

"Oh," says Pearl, "Amazing, it was...I never felt so clean...like every part of my body being massaged all at once?"

Steven blushes.

"Dude," says Amethyst, "what are you even talking about?"

"My date," says Pearl, "but oh right, private talk. So as it turns out they're metaphysical beings. Their insides are just like the rooms here in the temple containing metaphysical spaces. Mai brought me home the second I heard what happend. Oh my goodness that boss of hers, she claims she's used to fighting, and I qoute far stronger beings than Gems, but I don't know what they could be talking about."

Pearl pauses, "But seriously Steven, she said she knocked you through a boulder, are you sure you're okay."

"I've gone through worse," says Steven, "but it wasn't just the impact, its like each time I hit her my strength was vanishing."

"Well," says Pearl, "don't know anything about that, I'll ask."

She walks over and opens up the door, yelling out, "Mai! Steven says his strength was vanishing every time he punched Lo Yin, do you know what caused that?"

"She's here?!" shouts Steven.

"Oh right," says Pearl opening the door as Mai steps in.

Everyone who can brandishes weapons.

"Oh put those away," says Pearl.

"Are you feeling alright Pearl?" asks Garnet, "Last time we saw you, this, whatever she is, swallowed you gem."

"I'm fantastic," says Pearl, "but yeah, that's why she waited outside, thought this might be a bit awkward what with her overly dramatic boss."

Mai steps forward, "Yeah, sorry about that, just having a laugh with you. Being peeping toms on our date and all thought I'd have a little fun with you."

"You abducted Pearl," says Steven, "Ki Ki and Bixbite saw the whole thing."

"I said I'd give her a ride back to my place and show her what I can do."

"and did she," adds Pearl.

"Okay," says Steven, "too much information for Steven, you're fine, its fine, I'm done, I got to get ready for tomorrow's classes. Just promise me no more weird surprises; or describing to me what you two do in private please."

"Okay Steven," says Pearl

After everyone heads their seperate ways and a few hours later Pearl and Mai are talking in the kitching when Amethyst walks in, "Woah, what is going on here?" spotting Pearl's arm halfway down Mai's throat and whip cream open on the counter and clear up to Pearl's shoulder.

Pearl retrieves her arm and Mai licks her lips.

"Oh, hello Amethyst." says Pearl,

"Dude...what?" asks Amethyst just pointing at Pearl and the whipcream.

"I've never felt so clean, and the massaging..."

"Dude, this is what Steven was talking about, whatever freaky stuff you are into now Pearl its fine, just...not in the kitchen okay."

As Pearl and Mai walk away Amethyst overhears Pearl say, "Well yeah I can easily withstand those temperatures, do you really think those sauces will enhance my flavor enough that you'll savor me in your mouth slowly; everytime I cooked that recipe for Steven he just inhaled the food...hmm, being baked into a pie sounds kinda relaxing to be honest."

Amethyst pauses in the front door way, pictuing Pearl lying back in a pie crust, then herself like its a spa, she shakes her head, "I like to eat, not be eaten...I think."


End file.
